A fatal accident occurred this weekend at an intersection we drive through regularly. It's a back road, the straight shot from my home to my sister's four miles away. An 18 year old ran a stop sign and the 30 year old driver of a passing car died. I drove by the site this evening and cried. Not just for the man who lost his life (whom I don't know) but for the child, the 18 year old whose life is forever changed from that instant in time.
I am not afraid to die. I'm not afraid of what comes next. I know my family would all be okay. But I cannot for the life of me imagine what my life would be like if it had been James who had been struck, or Jacob. I cannot begin to think of how I would even cope if one of them was taken so suddenly. It doesn't just take a car accident. My dad reminded me just yesterday of a well-known family fact: one trip to the doctor can change your life forever.
I know James loves me deeply, I have no doubt. And I don't have one single regret or wish for our life to be any different than it is. I wouldn't mourn for all the things we never got to - we live our life as full as possible most every chance we get. I would just miss him so. I would miss him dreadfully so.
And Jacob. I don't see him very often now, and I don't hear from him too often, either, but if he was gone forever? Oh how my heart would break. He is such an amazing person, I just want to see where his life takes him and all the happiness that surrounds him.
In the blink of an eye, it could be gone. Life redefined.
This 30 year old man left behind a fiancee. Her life redefined. The 18 year old who ran the stop sign will never ever be the same, nor will the passenger that was in the car with him/her.
I am so grateful that was not my James, nor my Jacob. But my heart and soul aches for those affected by this one instant in time that went horribly wrong.