Flash: Hello from the Big Honking Rainstorm that may or may not be headed your way! Biiiiig honking storm.
Mom: Nice! Keep it in Illinois, would ya?
Flash: We’re still being clobbered. A tree branch dropped by to say hi, but so far so good.
Mom: Don't feel any need to send it this way. You can keep it in Chicago.
Flash: I thought you might want it so I gift-wrapped it with thunder and a nice lightning show too!
Mom: Oh yeah, nice radar pics. Thanks.
Flash: Just a little something to let you know I was thinking of you. Glad you enjoyed it. Lemme know if there’s anything else you have your eye on.
Mom: That is so sweet of you! You didn’t need to send more damaging winds. Really. Thanks for the lack of Internet and intermittent TV that came with your gift!
Flash: It’s the gift that keeps on giving! Only the best for my loving mother!
My son went to Chicago and all I got was this crappy rainstorm.