And So It Goes

To keep balance in the universe and my pride in check, yesterday’s progress report from LM’s fifth grade teacher wasn’t so warm and fuzzy. “Lack of impulse control”, “Needs to put in more effort” and “Neatness” were just a few things listed that he needs to work on.

Sigh.

The meeting itself went well. What they teach in fifth grade is actually quite amusing in that “it doesn’t make any sense, but that’s how the state requirements read” sort of way. For example, the students are taught about HIV/AIDS. They learn what the acronym stands for, how it is acquired and ways they can avoid the risk. They suggest abstinence from “unprotected sex” and “illegal needle drug use”. Trouble is, at no point whatsoever do they define what “protected sex” might be, or exactly what would make one drug illegal and another not. Their complete definition of sex for the kids? “When the penis and the vaginal come together.” Seriously. That’s the definition.

Now, I realize, these kids are young, and you start explanations simply and build upon that foundation. But why teach AIDS and how to avoid it if they don’t understand what it means to protect themselves during sex? LM thought that all drugs were legal (Tylenol, cold medicine, etc. are ‘drugs’ to him) and he didn’t understand the “needle” reference at all. He thinks that to “do drugs” means to take six aspirin when the bottle says to take two. Oh Lucccyyyyy, you got some s’plainin to do!!!

And, right at the end of the meeting, when I was trying to ask the Supervisor of Curriculum when (or if) they discussed homosexuality with the kids, my ex decides to track me down and join the conversation. NICE. (As it turns out, they don’t discuss it. Maybe in high school, the one guy thought, but certainly it is never mentioned to elementary kids.)

After the meeting, I talked with LM’s dad about the Progress Report and then we started talking about half a dozen other issues and I mentioned that I’ve sent out more resumes to Michigan and that LM seems to be handling the idea okay, but with some understandable hesitation and he nearly freaks out saying that I didn’t tell him I’ve talked with LM about moving to Michigan. Um, yes I did. And we talk (again) about why I want to move and he seems to understand it, but not really. He has no desire to own a home and wouldn’t move himself from the line of fire without a shove – he’s just that passive of a guy.) So he continues to act as if there should be no reasonable explanation for why I would move our son to another state. None. Not everyone lives in a house, Amy. Lots of people live in condos. Lots of teenagers live in condos. It’s not a bad thing. Um, yeah. Well, in my life, if I can offer something better, I will.

I picked LM up from church youth group and came home and he wanted to know what the meeting was about. We talked for awhile and he was able to articulate to me very clearly what is unique about his situation with his dad. We talked about the lessons he’ll have in Health in the next month or so and how that might raise more questions for him, and decided his best option was to bring his questions home to Mom. We also talked about how his dad and I disagree on the subject (Biblically) and why that was really the main reason for our divorce. LM understood it all, handled it with grace and was able to start understanding the implications it has on his own life. (Mainly in terms of how much he does or does not want to share with his peers about his home situation.)

And then I watched “Lost”.

And then I went to bed, mentally exhausted.

It's days like yesterday that make me wish even more that I could just go hang out at my sister's with a tequila sunrise in hand and swing in the hammock with George.